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Lighten Up 10 August 2001 Edition
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Million $ Ideas
At last, the contents of Aardvark's "million-dollar ideas" notebook are revealed for all to see!
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Come on baby, light my carrot
Did you know that carrots and microwave ovens can be an "en-lightning" combination?

Extreme Ironing
The latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well pressed shirt.

Nose
I can think of no comment that accurately describes this page -- wierd!

Thank Goodness For Politicians!
Just like those poor Californians, New Zealand is facing a power crisis.

Yes, most of our power is generated from renewable resources -- but it's nature which decides exactly when and at what rate those resources will be renewed -- so we're at the mercy of the lake levels.

But wait... we don't need to be!

Now if Jim Anderton is reading this I suspect we'll see some real action in the next few weeks. Based on his whole-hearted support of those great magnetic fuel-savers which, for some strange reason, have yet to slash the nation's fuel bill by up to 20%, I think he'll be interested in what I've found.

It seems that some really smart guys in the USA have developed a "remarkable 30KW generator [that] could eliminate your electric utility bill & provide total 'energy independence'"

But wait... there's more!

How much would you expect to pay for this incredible device?

Well, believe it or not, you can sign up and receive a FREE generator for just US$5. That's right, it's not a typo -- just five US dollars will get you one of these amazing devices.

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Now I know you're probably thinking "this can't be true" -- but it must be -- because:

  1. I read it on the Internet
  2. It uses magnets -- just like that fuel-saver device!
So come on Jim -- save NZ from the tyranny of low lake levels -- take another few million dollars from the health vote (those kids don't really need those operations do they?) and sign up every household in New Zealand to this amazing scheme!

If you don't believe me -- you can see for yourself how wonderful this new system is by visiting their website for more information.

Uh-oh... sorry, I've just heard from Helen -- she's told me that despite what almost 90% of New Zealanders say, she knows (as if by convenient magic) that not only don't they want fewer MPs, they also don't want free electricity.

Oh well, so much for that idea. I'm so glad we have trustworthy and altruistic politicians to tell us what we're thinking -- aren't you?

I must be confused -- can someone explain the difference between the democracy we now have and an autocracy?

Can I quote from a speech given by Jim Anderton just last month:

"Democracy is a precious and valuable idea...
This brings to mind the graffiti "Democracy used to be great, but now it has got into the wrong hands". In the 1980s and early 90s in New Zealand Parliament 'got into the wrong hands' and lost touch with most New Zealanders"

In light of the recent words of Helen Clark, and the Alliance's opposition to reducing the number of MPs as clearly demanded by more than 80% of voters (reiterated by a 90%+ confirmation in a Holmes poll taken last night) I think Mr Anderton's words ring decidedly hollow!

Need Egg? See Microsoft
Oh dear, poor old Microsoft has done it again.

Once again their "do as we say, not as we do" attitude to security has left them with more egg on their face than a 5-year-old in a food-fight.

It seems that a number of its HotMail servers were hit with the Code Red worm -- oh dear, how sad, never mind.

If I were a real b*stard I guess I could email them a copy of the security bulletin they sent out to admins a week or so ago - but I could never be so rude :-)


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Code Red Worm A 'Runaway Success' (7amNews - 20/07/2001)

Solaris bug gives hackers free rein (ZDNet - 22/06/2001)

Microsoft Admits Another 'Serious Vunerability' In IIS 7amNews - 19/06/2001)

Trojan horse targets Word users (CNet - 14/06/2001t)

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The Day's Top News
Open in New Window = open in new window
New Zealand

Open in New Window Coalition cash for internet venture
The Government will today announce funding of more than $1 million for a mobile internet project, highlighting its willingness to give incentives to businesses contributing to "a knowledge society"...
NZ Herald

Open in New Window NZ .info names go offshore
The new top level domain name .info is supposed to be in its sunrise period, where only registered trademark holders can buy names, however newzealand.info has been snapped by by a man living in Sheffield...
IDG

Other

Open in New Window Scientists Build Anti-Gravity Device
A whole new era of terrestrial and space transportation may be about to open up in the wake of a new device developed by two scientists which appears to generate a powerful anti-gravity field...
7amNews.com

Open in New Window Code Red II Worms Its Way Deeper Into Internet
The Code Red II computer virus has wormed its way deeper into the World Wide Web, costing nearly $2 billion on its way to becoming one of the most expensive security threats to hit the Internet...
Yahoo

Open in New Window MPEG-4's features: Feasible or too sci-fi?
While Microsoft and RealNetworks wage a noisy fight over their audio and video technologies, an underdog with a strong pedigree and whiz-bang features is quietly entering the fray...
CNet

Open in New Window U.S. Dismantles Internet Child Porn Enterprise
U.S. officials announced on Wednesday the dismantling of ``the largest known commercial child pornography enterprise'' ever, with 100 arrests over two years after an undercover investigation of a Texas company that distributed child pornography over the Internet...
CNet

Open in New Window Judges: Don't Monitor Our PCs
The computers of federal judges are being monitored by their Washington managers, and not only don't they like it, they say it's illegal...
Wired

Australia

Open in New Window Bank service sparks privacy fears
PRIVACY fears could arise over a new service from the Commonwealth Bank that provides internet users with the ability to aggregate all online financial services on one site...
Australian IT

Open in New Window You will pay more for Windows from October 1
The software giant Microsoft will raise prices by 10 per cent on selected products from October 1, claiming a weakening Australian dollar as the cause...
Fairfax

Other

Open in New Window Ordinary Electrical Outlets May Rule Home Networking
Tired of paying for extra phone lines or wireless gadgets to network your personal computers and laptops at home? Soon you will have a simpler and cheaper option -- your garden-variety home electrical outlets...
Yahoo/NewsFactor

Open in New Window MS poised to switch Windows file systems with Blackcomb
The pieces are coming together for a clear shift in the way Microsoft does data storage. It is coming full circle, right back to the unified storage model of Cairo, promised but not delivered back in the early 1990s as the super-OS built upon Windows NT...
The Register

Open in New Window Hollywood PCs leak like a sieve
The film industry's losses to cybercrime are growing, so studios are bringing in their own hackers to protect their secrets...
ZDNet

Open in New Window Holding up the rear
Where did all that start-up money go? Clue No. 1: Today's dot-com auctions are flooded with opulent Aeron chairs...
Salon

Open in New Window Five Arrested in $28 Million Net Fraud Case in China
Police arrested five people in what could be China's biggest yet Internet get-rich-quick scam, involving $28.25 million, the official Xinhua news agency said Wednesday...
Yahoo


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